Exciting is fickle

Childrens_MinistryOver the last several years, I heard a number of churches advertising their “exciting children’s ministry.” It seems that every new church start that put an ad on the radio wanted to be sure you knew their children’s ministry was exciting.

I may be in the minority, but as a father, that’s not what I want to hear. And as a pastor, it’s not a promise I want to make.

The demands of “exciting” are relentless. When you’re exciting today, your credit doesn’t last very long, but the expectations increase. What will you do to be even more exciting next week? And the week after that? And how long will people stick around once the excitement wanes? Check out the attendance for a slumping sports team and you might see.

As a father, what I want you to tell me is that your children’s ministry is focused on relationships. I want you to tell me that you have godly adults who will make my children feel special and valued. I want you to tell me that your first focus is investing in those relationships.

Therein lies the difference. Exciting is fickle; relationships are an investment. How much credit do you get from being exciting two weeks ago? A few weeks’ worth, probably. How much credit do you get from building a relationship two weeks ago? My six year-old is still talking about Miss Barry, her Sunday School teacher last year. I still revere some of those adults who loved and cared for me in the church when I was just in elementary school.

As a father, I’m scared that if your children’s ministry focuses on exciting, my kids will eventually give up on the church. There will come a week or month that it’s just not exciting enough and they’ll decide church isn’t for them anymore. Or they’ll join the crowd of roaming, dissatisfied Christians who can never settle down. Nothing excites or delights for long.

As a pastor, I don’t want to promise exciting because I don’t believe we can deliver. Not consistently enough. Because exciting always demands more. “You already did that last week. You need to top it to impress me this week.” I can’t deliver on that. Delivering a constantly bigger spectacle takes too much energy if I want to ever take some time away for anything more than spectacle.

These aren’t mutually exclusive. I really would like my church’s children’s ministry to be enjoyable. I want my kids to want to be there. But I know that they won’t be there long if exciting is the best you have to offer. Offer me more Miss Barry’s, and I expect that my kids’ desire to be part of the church community will grow stronger, not weaker, over time.

** A note: I’ve said nothing here about faith. That’s deeply important to me. But my primary concern isn’t for the church to teach my kids about Christianity. It’s that they surround them with a community of love and forgiveness. It’s particularly that a number of godly adults invest in relationships with them. More on the church’s role in my kids’ faith later.

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The Bible as Interpreter of Us — Weekly Challenge #2

matthewDid you join me in praying for someone last week? If you have anything to share, I’d love to hear how it went.

It’s common for people to talk about interpreting the Bible. “How do you interpret this passage?” Or, “Well, that’s one interpretation of what Jesus meant there.” And to some degree this will always be the case. As rational creatures, we’re interpreters of all things. We interpret people’s body language. We interpret everything we read and everything we hear. The meaning of some things (e.g. most textbooks) is pretty easy to interpret. The meaning of others (e.g. a James Joyce novel), not so much. So it’s not unusual that we would think about interpreting the Bible.

Something that we give less attention to, though, is that the Bible is a book that’s meant to interpret us. That is, it has something to tell us about who we are — who we really are — and it has something to tell us about how we’re living. In fact, some of the biggest transformations in my life have come when I’ve allowed the Bible to really interpret me. To tell me that actions I had decided were okay really weren’t. To tell me that I needed to be giving more attention to actions I had neglected. To tell me who I was when I was telling myself I was something else.

It has been when I’ve allowed the Bible to interpret me that I’ve done things I otherwise wouldn’t have done — apologized to people I didn’t want to apologize to, requested cuts in my salary, and scheduled appointments with people I didn’t want to spend time with, to name a few. It has also been when I’ve allowed the Bible to interpret me that I’ve seen hard situations in a different light — giving me reasons for hope and joy in the midst of sorrow or doubt.

My challenge for all of us this week, then, is to spend some time reading the Bible and asking it to interpret us. I want to read with the question, “What does this have to say to me about who I am and how I’m living?” I want to be open to a surprising and unconventional interpretation of our lives. An interpretation of us that may be different from what most of the people around us might give.

I think one of the best places to start with this is Jesus’ “Sermon on the Mount” in Matthew chapters 5 through 7. What if you read that through this week, constantly asking what it has to tell you about who you are and how you’re living? You might read all three chapters on one day, then take the rest of the week to read slowly and carefully. I’m planning to keep a running written list about who this tells me I am and what it has to say about how I’m living. Things like this seem to have much more impact when I take the time to write observations.

What do you say? Join me?

Two quotes

Let me share two quotes with you that I’ve found profound and helpful as I consider taking seriously what I see in Scripture. [I share both of these extended excerpts believing they fit within “fair use” guidelines.]

This profound piece is from J. I. Packer in Knowing God (pp. 306-309):

We are unlike the Christians of New Testament times. Our approach to life is conventional and static; theirs was not. The thought of “safety first” was not a drag on their enterprise as it is on ours. By being exuberant, unconventional and uninhibited in living by the gospel they turned their world upside down, but you could not accuse us twentieth-century Christians of doing anything like that. Why are we so different? Why, compared with them, do we appear as no more than halfway Christians? Whence comes the nervous, dithery, take-no-risks mood that mars so much of our discipleship? Why are we not free enough from fear and anxiety to allow ourselves to go full stretch in following Christ?

One reason, it seems, is that in our heart of hearts we are afraid of the consequences of going the whole way into the Christian life. We shrink from accepting burdens of responsibility for others because we fear we should not have strength to bear them. We shrink from accepting a way of life in which we forfeit material security because we are afraid of being left stranded. We shrink from being meek because we are afraid that if we do not stand up for ourselves we shall be trodden down and victimized, and end up among life’s casualties and failures. We shrink from breaking with social conventions in order to serve Christ because we fear that if we did, the established structure of our life would collapse all around us, leaving us without a footing anywhere.

It is these half-conscious fears, this dread of insecurity, rather than any deliberate refusal to face the cost of following Christ, which make us hold back. We feel that the risks of out-and-out discipleship are too great for us to take. In other words, we are not persuaded of the adequacy of God to provide for all the needs of those who launch out wholeheartedly on the deep sea of unconventional living in obedience to the call of Christ. Therefore, we feel obliged to break the first commandment just a little, by withdrawing a certain amount of our time and energy from serving God in order to serve mammon. This, at bottom, seems to be what is wrong with us. We are afraid to go all the way in accepting the authority of God, because of our secret uncertainty as to his adequacy to look after us if we do.

[…]

Have you been holding back from a risky, costly course to which you know in your heart God has called you? Hold back no longer. Your God is faithful to you, and he is adequate for you. You will never need more than he can supply, and what he supplies, both materially and spiritually, will always be enough for the present. “No good thing does the LORD withhold from those who walk uprightly” (Ps 84:11 RSV). “God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your strength, but with the temptation will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it” (1 Cor 10:13 RSV). “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” (2 Cor 12:9). Think on these things!—and let your thoughts drive out your inhibitions about serving your Master.

And this piece is from James K.A. Smith in Desiring the Kingdom, 218-219, [paragraph breaks are mine to make it easier to read digitally]. You’ll see at the end that he’s specifically thinking about “Christian colleges and universities,” but it applies to all of us, I think.

[W]hat if a Christian perspective turns out to be a way of domesticating the radicality of the gospel? What if the rather abstract formulas of a Christian worldview turn out to be a way to tame and blunt the radical call to be a disciple of the coming kingdom?

Could it be the case that learning a Christian perspective doesn’t actually touch my desire, and that while I might be able to think about the world from a Christian perspective, at the end of the day I love not the kingdom of God but rather the kingdom of the market?

By reducing the genius of Christian faith to something like an intellectual framework–a ‘perspective’ or a ‘worldview’–we can (perhaps unwittingly) unhook Christianity from the practices that constitute Christian discipleship. And when that happens, we end up thinking that being a Christian doesn’t radically re-configure our desires and our wants, our practices and our habits.

Sure, we might think that we’re supposed to be moral, but we’ll construe this in terms of personal integrity (e.g., ‘honest’ business dealings) or instrumentalizing existing cultural systems for charitable ends (e.g., ‘redeeming’ exploitative business practices by donation a portion of profits to charity; or generating philanthropy for non-profits that is fueled by the charity of the extremely wealthy).

In too many cases, a Christian perspective doesn’t seem to challenge the very configuration of these careers and vocations.

To be blunt, our Christian colleges and universities generate an army of alumni who look pretty much like all the rest of their suburban neighbors, except that our graduates drive their SUVs, inhabit their executive homes, and pursue the frenetic life of the middle class and the corporate ladder ‘from a Christian perspective.”

If we truly allowed the Bible to interpret who we are and how we live, would we look a bit more distinct from our neighbors? Would our approach to life be considered a bit more unconventional and dynamic?

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Two kinds of worship

light showI was involved in two different campus ministries in college. Each had a big weekly meeting for worship. Those two meetings were quite different.

The first ministry — we’ll call them Seeker-Friendly-Ministries — was especially concerned to make their meeting appealing to non-Christians. They worked hard to make sure that what they did looked as much like pop culture entertainment as it looked like “church.” There were funny skits, entertaining emcee’s, and well-choreographed dances to complement a few praise songs and a message. Each week’s meeting had a timesheet that was followed down to the minute and a production director that wore a headset and kept things on schedule throughout.

The second ministry — we’ll call them All-About-Worship — seemed less concerned with all of this appeal. In fact, they made it known that their purpose for meeting was simply to worship. The schedule was much more plain, by comparison. Everyone sang praise songs for 30-40 minutes, then there was a 30-minute sermon. There was a funny skit here and there, but they were infrequent and clearly not as much rehearsed.

I took several of my fraternity brothers to both. These were guys who weren’t involved in the Church and probably wouldn’t have even considered themselves Christians. Their reactions were interesting and unanimous. None of them cared much for the Seeker-Friendly-Ministries meeting. They didn’t say why; they just weren’t that interested, and I don’t recall any of them going back a second time.

But they all enjoyed the All-About-Worship meeting. And nearly all of them went back another time. Some became regulars there.

I remember sitting at a leaders’ meeting for Seeker-Friendly-Ministries where people were talking about what to do for the weekly meeting. After a lot of discussion about what kinds of skits and themes to use next year, the student who had just been named “Weekly Meeting Director” for the next year spoke up:

Here’s what I want. I want our weekly meeting to be about worship. I want it to be focused on God. I want to stop worrying so much about entertaining the people who might come, and I want to worry about us coming and worshiping. I’m not saying that selfishly because the thing is, I really think it would be more “attractive” to people who aren’t Christians to come and see us in genuine worship rather than seeing us put on a show.

That meeting happened 13 years ago, so I probably didn’t quote him perfectly here. But I think I got it pretty close, because what he said was profound and influential for me.

I think that student leader pegged what my fraternity brothers had demonstrated. Seeing a group of Christians genuinely at worship is more winsome than seeing a group of Christians put on an entertaining show. Our world isn’t lacking much for entertainment. It’s lacking quite a bit for genuine worship.

Sadly, that student leader’s thoughts were pushed to the side. What he said didn’t fit with the Seeker-Friendly-Ministries strategy. I tried to take a few more people the following year, but their response was much the same as before. After that, I quit trying and only invited my non-Christian friends to the All-About-Worship meetings.