Repentance is an act aimed at the root of sin […] One does not repent by trimming leaves one at a time, or even by cutting off an entire branch. The whole life of sin must go, must be renounced altogether, and peremptorily.
Author: Teddy Ray
“Where does discipleship lead?” or “The disciples became apostles”
Discipleship is often treated today as an end in itself. And to a certain extent, I’ll agree with that. When we worship, pray, study Scripture, fast, do works of mercy and works of piety, etc., these activities are the point. They’re means of God’s grace and ways we honor God, so we do them.
But it’s also important to note that the disciples became apostles! The primary designation for this bunch throughout the gospels is disciples. Once we get to the book of Acts, though, their primary designation becomes apostles. [There are no hard lines here. We see “apostles” in the gospels and “disciples” in Acts.]
That shouldn’t be surprising. When Jesus calls the disciples, he says, “Come, follow me, and I will send you out to fish for people.” At Jesus’ discipleship call, he tells them their roles will change. He will send them. They will end up going out to make disciples.
It’s not just that the disciples will be inwardly transformed – becoming people who know God differently, who pray and read Scripture and do good deeds and avoid evil. They will be sent to reproduce themselves with more disciples!
When we call people to discipleship today, do we tell them we are calling them to send them? My experience is that we too often simply call people to be disciples. We say something to the effect of, “Come, follow Jesus… so that you can keep following… and keep following… and keep following.” And keep following we must! But that isn’t all.
If this is all we call people to, many will imagine themselves going to Bible studies and learning new interesting things, and perhaps applying small bits of those in their lives from now until they die.
But do they understand that they are called to be sent? Do they understand that a call to discipleship inherently includes preparation to become apostles and pastors?
By “apostles and pastors,” I don’t mean to suggest here that all Christians must become career ministers, who draw a paycheck from a church or missions organization. Quite the opposite. Many of the early Christians remained as carpenters, fishermen, and tent-makers, yet spread this radical revolution across the land. Many of the unheralded heroes of the early Methodist movement continued on as plant workers, yet served as the pillars and backbone of local churches as class leaders (see my post “Re-evangelizing America…“)
What I mean to suggest is that Christian engineers and landscapers and business(wo)men must see themselves as people sent to be apostles and pastors. That these people see themselves as the pillars and backbone of the Christian movement today. That these invest themselves as seriously as they can in their own discipleship, because they know it leads to a sending.
Disciples, are you treating your discipleship as if you’re being prepared to be pastors and apostles, leading others to the Christian faith and/or discipling them in that faith? We need you!
Career pastors and preachers, when you call people to discipleship, do you say, “And I will send you out to fish for people.” Is that your expectation of disciples? And are you investing enough in them to make that a reality?
[I want to be careful here not to contradict my post “When ‘missional church’ gets too outwardly focused.” I think there’s a place for what I said there and what I say here. I was addressing one problem in that post, and a problem on the opposite side in this. If you think I’m just contradicting myself, call me on it.]
Ministry needs, family values, and balance
Perhaps the two best-known leaders in the Christian movement from the 1950’s into the 1980’s were Billy Graham and Bill Bright. Both men influenced countless pastors who grew up in those generations and left an enormous impact, especially on the American evangelical landscape.
Both men’s (auto)biographies also reveal a fair bit of tension between family and ministry needs. A couple excerpts…
From Billy Graham’s autobiography, Just As I Am:
As we drove into the yard, I saw a beautiful little child wandering out to greet us. Even after I got out of the car, it took some minutes before I realized that it was Ned [Graham’s son]. I hadn’t seen him for many weeks.
Yes, it took him a few minutes before he realized the beautiful child was his son. Graham talks about the difficulties of being away from home for weeks and months at a time and says the “traveling ministry was a costly investment of [his] time as far as [his] sons were concerned.”
Bright’s authorized biography, Amazing Faith, also talks about the “sacrifice” for Bright’s sons, Brad and Zac:
There were, however, all too few father-son activities for these growing boys; it was in fact a sacrifice for them to do without Dad. By God’s grace they came through with balanced lives. Their mother’s example was especially helpful. Both Brad and Zac would later say they could recall no occasion when their mother bemoaned Bill’s absence. Eventually they concluded that if she could handle his absence patiently and quietly in dependence on the Lord, so could they.
I also recall a prayer Bright said while he traveled the world – something to the effect of, “God, tend to my flock at home while I tend to your flock around the world” – but I haven’t been able to locate the exact quote.
By my observation, a nation of ministers largely grew up with a similar mentality about family and ministry: “God, I pray you take care of my family while I go about the call of ministry.” I’ve seen a number of examples of pastors who have “sacrificed” family, friendships, and/or health for the sake of the call.
Changes in views of ministry and family balance
Also by my observation, several prominent ministers in the next generation have largely rejected these “sacrifices.” In his book Choosing to Cheat: Who Wins When Family and Work Collide?
Simply put, you must choose to cheat at work rather than at home.
That’s quite a turn from what we saw and heard from Graham and Bright.
Rob Bell has never been shy to say that he doesn’t do night meetings. He’s busy having dinner with his family at home. And he talks about Sabbath frequently, asking people when is the day they totally disconnect from the world and are present at home.
In my humble opinion, Stanley and Bell are providing far better guidance and influence on this topic than Graham and Bright did. (That’s not meant to discredit the truly great work those men did.) I hope these kinds of influence will lead to a new generation of pastors that prioritizes family, personal health, friendships and Sabbath more than most of the past generation seems to have.
Pastors, whatever your calling, if God has blessed you with a family, you cannot neglect them! That goes, too, for other church leaders and volunteers. Please don’t choose (or let the church convince you) to give more of your time and energy to tending the flock of the church than to tending your own flock.
Doing pastoral ministry and caring for family well – the rub
I recently heard Tim Couch, a former University of Kentucky football player, asked if he had considered coaching. His response (paraphrased as I remember it): “I would love to coach. But I also have two young children, and working in TV lets me be home with them a lot more than coaching would.”
I’ve often wondered how college football coaches take care of their families well, especially if they have young children. From what I understand, they work incredibly long hours, spend a lot of time on the road recruiting, and move more often than young Methodist clergy. Tim Couch’s comments seemed to confirm that it’s tough to do the job well and also be there for family. The requirements of some jobs just don’t lend themselves to being there for family at the most important times.
Andy Stanley and Rob Bell aren’t your typical American pastors. As I understand it, both of them have/had roles with very little pastoral care and almost no work with volunteers. That’s very different from the majority of pastors I know, whose roles require quite a bit of pastoral care and work with volunteers, at least if the job is to be done well.
When you desire to provide good pastoral care and need to meet with teams of volunteers, not to mention any of the other typical church programs and events, you’re usually talking about a lot of nights and weekends. And if you’ve ever had young children, you know that night-time, especially dinner time and bed time, is probably the most important time to be home.
There’s the rub.
And this at least has me wondering — how well can one balance pastoral ministry and family values, especially with young children? The two seem to have conflicting prime times.
What do you think?
You would also be interested in my Modern Pastor Series.
teddy ray 